29 Sep How To Prepare For A Divorce

A divorce is never an easy process to navigate. However, there are 5 ways to make the procedure less stressful, emotional and costly.

If you or your partner have made the difficult decision to get a divorce, having some sense of what to expect will ensure that an already overwhelming process is made a little easier for everyone who may be affected.

To help you prepare, we have put together this guide of actionable tips. These resources derive from people who have experienced divorce themselves and now know how they would have handled things differently or systems they could have implemented to make certain hurdles more manageable. Unfortunately, several unprecedented outcomes and scenarios can arise during the process, making it impossible to cover everything, so this guide focuses on the basics.

1. Organise Your Assets

The divorce process introduces a million significant decisions that will affect you and your family for years to come. How you prepare will determine whether these effects are positive or negative. It’s best to get as organised as possible regarding your shared assets to make better negotiations and hopefully receive the best possible settlement agreement.

Choosing a competent mediator or family lawyer to help guide you through these proceedings will make decision-making more manageable as they will advise you on how to get financially prepared. On the note of finances, it’s wise to begin setting aside some financial resources beforehand – doing this can go a long way, and you will thank yourself later.

It’s a good idea to work alongside your spouse to make a list of all your assets and debts and to organise copies of all financial statements and records. Create a marital budget so that you can gain a good understanding of what your current monthly expenses look like living together. From there, you can create a projected monthly expenditure for post-separation and for living independently.

2. Do Your Research

Understanding how the divorce process works will offer some foresight into what is to come. Even if you are working closely with legal support, preparing will help eliminate or minimise unwanted surprises.

Thousands of online resources and blogs are available about other divorcees sharing their experiences to help prepare and educate those heading down the same road. Make use of these resources and use a support system to mentally and emotionally prepare you.

3. Keep Your Integrity

Keeping your integrity during a procedure like this is undeniably hard, but keeping yourself in check will make all the difference in the long run.

Your spouse might have the ability to fire you up, but you must not let them get the best of you. Don’t turn to social media or your children to publicly rant about details regarding your divorce or your spouse’s antics – this will only damage your case and make it a messier ordeal to overcome.

Instead, focus your energy on caring for yourself. Seek out a good therapist that you feel connected with, exercise, spend time with people you love and who love you and find comfort in activities that bring you joy. All these practices will help to ensure that the divorce is just an unfortunate event in your life and not a life-defining moment.

4. Pick Your Battles

With a divorce, it’s easy to get stuck on semantics. Doing this will drain your energy and prevent you from looking at the big picture, which is, what your life will look like after the process is final. What long-term effects are you comfortable living with for yourself and your children?

Pick your battles wisely because you can’t fight all of them. The better prepared you are, the less chance there is of being blindsided. The truth is that nobody wins in a divorce, so it’s essential to keep your eye on the settlement agreement that you’re most comfortable with and avoid the mess that the alternative can bring.

5. Prepare For Custody

If children are involved, you need to prepare for the inevitable battle of child custody. During this process, the court will make decisions based on the child’s/children’s best interest. They will consider several determinants, including whether or not there was alcohol or drug use, the mental and physical state of each parent, schools, religious factors, the relationship between each parent with the child/children, as well as several other considerations.

If gaining custody is a priority, you must be prepared to focus mainly on this goal and accept that trading off and negotiating will be the way forward regarding other issues.

It is undeniable that going through a divorce is mentally, emotionally, and financially taxing. However, with proper preparation, support, and resources on your side, there are ways to make the process easier.

At FEDOROV Family Lawyers, we will give you real family law advice that you can trust to empower you to make the right decisions for you, your family, and your future. For assistance or to speak to an expert, please feel free to contact us today.